Plane Journal, Entry 2

Take off went well. The view is amazing! I wish I could have filmed as we took off but we weren't allowed. It's so awesome! This has all been made by God. WE'RE FLYING! We're 6131 miles from Tokyo. I'm taking pictures from my window and listening to my mp3. It's so cool! If I couldn't look out the windo and literally see us tilting I wouldn't know it was happening. I still wish I could have experience it with Bob but I'm thankful to experience it at all. All this is only possible through God. There is that Bottom Line again =) All glory to God for flight! =) I'm gonna have to shut my windo if I'm ever going to sleep. Just a little FYI... plane food isn't so bad... so far.

Plane Journal, Entry 1

I just got on the plane. I don't want to be here though. I want to be back at the airport with Bob and Mandi. I really don't have anyone in flight group that I clicked with. Well I kinda did with Grant (a guy of course). I do have Teo in my trek but I'm not near him, or Tyler, or Grant. I know there is a reason for this, God uses everything for His glory. I did get a window seat =) Some consolation huh? My tv doesn't work though. I'm just praying God will use my isolation. Maybe so it'll be easier for me to make relationships with the Japanese. You'd think with this many Christians that have an amazing enough relationship with God would realize what I'm feeling. This must be part of my 'suffering' for Christ. I'm not really worried about my plane though. I hope the guys got to sit together. Or with Mandi or Nora. I've met someone kinda like me. We both hide our feelings, praying someone will past the ruse to our hearts. Our flight is late taking off. Stupid paperwork =)

Base Camp, Day 2, Entry 2

Once again laying in bed. I got hit pretty hard that I was harboring bitterness towards someone. I still don't like what's happening but I need to pray, not rely on myself. But I just start singing "How He Loves" and remind myself of God's glory... the bottom line. He has a purpose for this. I prayed, asking God that He would allow me to suffer for Him. And less than 30 minutes later His spirit broke my heart harder than its ever been broken before. He also placed a burden on my heart to pray for them. Not a selfish prayer. Just that they would be filled with His spirit and would be led by Him. "Take my life and let it be, all for You and for Your glory. Take my life and let it be Yours. Glory to God. Glory to God. Glory to God forever."

Base Camp, Day 2, Entry 1

iGosia is officially finished =) I am an iGosian. No more lost luggage, gross food (breakfast was okay), yelling people, or people trying to take my stuff. I was the only one of our 3 to lose my luggage... of course. Still haven't really clicked with anyone. I get to hang with Mandi and Nora some but not much. I almost never get to see the guys either. What is ironic is that Bob is 1 of 4 from his trek to be on the other plane =( We're going to spend the day listening to lots of teaching, hopefully music too. I'm praying for God to ruin me still and I know there is a reason for this. I'm pretty social though so I'd really like to find someone. Everyone kinda acts like they wish I wouldn't talk as much. Ugh. God help me.

Base Camp, Day 1, Entry 2

Okay so I'm finally laying in bed. I managed to snag 3 beds next to each other for me, Mandi, and Nora. Mandi and I "lost" our luggage but at least they provided towels and stuff. I left my pillow in Ms. Dawn's car... note to self, get my pillow back. God is already working here. His presence is thicker than the humidity :) I haven't found anyone in my trek that I click with. I'm kind of the loner I guess but God is continuing to show me that He is sufficient. His love never fails. I do kinda miss my family... and Sam... and Tally... I even miss Bob and he is here with me! The food at dinner was gross, but I did get to "enjoy" it with Bob. Just saying... bananas and gravy with cocoanut... don't do it! So far it hasn't been so terrible that I regret this. In a way, these "hardships" kinda help to confirm that I'm where I am supposed to be.

Base Camp, Day 1, Entry 1

Well we just got to "iGosia." Two words about base camp... HARD CORE! I thought I was gonna cry coming through 'customs.' But it was made up for when I got outside. God got me through that by sending Nick Gainey my way. He knew what he was doing and got us through pretty quick. I'm already missing familiar faces, Mom, Dad, Ms. Dawn, Mr. Dan... more than I can list. It's gonna be weird not texting my friends till I fall asleep but at least Bob is here. I've seen Adam, Gabby, Molly, Amanda, Tee, and Jeanie from my trek. We're sitting in a room with everyone. Me, Gabby, Adam, Tee, and Jeanie are the only ones here. I can already feel God working here. I'm praying hard for strength and patience. It's been more mental than physical. Its gonna be hard, but will better prepare me for Tokyo.

Journal Entries

Hey! Okay so I finally found time to start adding journal entries from Base Camp and Tokyo! I journaled everyday, sometimes more, while I was away. They will be exactly what I wrote at the moment I wrote it. My thoughts from that moment in time! I pray and hope that someting that I learned or that I say touches you in some way. May God get all the glory!

Ineffective Taunts

Okay so this may be the last time I post until after Tokyo. I'll be journaling everyday though so there will be plenty to read when I get home :)

God is still equipping me for Tokyo and I am loving what I'm finding!

"Then I will answer the one who taunts me, for I trust in Your word." v. 42

It's kind of like a 'nanny nanny boo boo' moment. Almost like 'I've got God, you can't get me!'

And as silly as that sounds its true. If we have Christ in our lives the satan has no hold over us. I don't even think my heart and my mind are even beginning to realize how awesome this is.

God has given me, all Christians really, He has given us the ability to send satan away. Heck yeah man! :)

I've been using the very old, very used, but very effective phrase 'get behind me satan in Christ's name' a lot lately.

I went to a church in my town that's not where I normally go last night. My youth group wasn't meeting because of our Vacation Bible School but I know a lot of the kids at the other church and the youth pastor, Cory, and I have gotten to be pretty good friends.

The lesson was about Meshach, Shadrach, and Abendego and how they were placed where they were (they were in pretty prominent positions in the government) by God so He would receive glory. Cory was talking about how we are all called somewhere, whether it be our hometowns or Tokyo like I'm going.

I found myself hoping Cory would say something about me and the trip to Tokyo. I squashed that feeling fast! I could tell it was only the sinful part of me wanting to be exalted. Immediately I started praying, got my head on straight and moved on.

Maybe 10 minutes later Cory made a comment about the Tokyo trip. My cheeks were red I could just feel them burning!

God allowed that to happen after I had my heart right so that I would have the love and prayers of the youth behind me.

I got my heart right, praised God for the opportunity to go to Japan and then He allowed Cory to say something.

That's God equipping His children :)

Continuous Reminders

It seems like the more I think about what God is doing for me in this situation that I find myself in the more He does. The more He gives me. He keeps showing me He has the strength to get me through this. Genesis 15:5 "God took Abraham outside and said 'look up at the heavens and count the stars- if indeed you can count them.' Then He said to him, 'So shall be your offspring.'" There is a pause in this verse where God waits for Abraham to count the stars. We don't ever think about Abraham actually attempting to count the stars. We would simply say "Uhhh... no thanks. Thats not possible." But I'm sure Abraham tried. And after a little time and lots of redos and startovers God finally told him 'So shall be your offspring.' God does stuff like this to give us a reminder of His promises. Its a very effective way of keeping His promises in sight instead of allowing us tp block them and forget them. He reminds me beacuse He loves me. How awesome??? No matter what else happens, in this time or in another, God will continue to remind me of what He has done. When I go through the day and look around me I see people I love, things of beauty, and so much that He has blessed me with. That in and of itself is a reminder. So ha! I don't have to worry :) In the words of Wes Hamilton "Thats not who I am so its not what I'll do."

All Sufficient Grace

The past couple of days I've been struggling a little. I've had something happen in my life that breaks my heart. I'm constantly praying for wisdom because I don't know what to do. This morning I had this strange craving. I had to find something in God's word. I didn't know what it was so before I started looking I asked God to show me. My thoughts turned to my Armed and Dangerous book. This book has been an amazing tool many times since I received it. It's bright orange and I definitely recommend getting it if you have the chance. It has many, many verses listed by topic. Abortion, accountability, ambition, appearance, bad habits, beauty, bitterness, compassion, confidence, conformity, envy, faith, dating, guilt, forgiveness, homosexuality, humility, money, marriage, persecution, prayer, pride, was, trouble... so many that all people deal with everyday. When I was looking through it this morning I flipped to the topic of defeat. It wasn't where I had planned on looking but when I saw it at the top of the page I thought it fitting. I did feel defeated in this situation. It was getting out of control and there was nothing I could do about it. But that's why God directed me to this verse. 2 Corinthians 12:9 "But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." His grace is sufficient... His power is made perfect in my weakness... How amazing is that? I can't get over it. When the words sank in I had this overwhelming peace. In this horrible situation God's power is made perfect. I continue to ask for wisdom because I know God has a plan for what is happening. I pray to be led to the foot of the cross because thats what everything comes back to. That was a day God's power was truly made perfect. Everything we do either leads someone to the cross or turns them away. I pray that in everything I do and say someone would see God's light and love.

6 Days Left

Okay so there is just 6 days until base camp. My goodness! I can't believe its actually here! Breazy and Katie are still off so keep praying for them! I'm so nervous but beyond excited. I may not know what to expect but I know God is already doing some great things. I can't even try to put any expectations out there because that would be like limiting God. There is not limit to what He will be doing! I pray that this would change lives. Not only for the Japanese but for all the kids, interns, coordinators, and missionaries with iGo Global. Actually God is going to change lives, of that I have no doubt, what I truly pray for is that it could be done gently in most cases. I know sometimes it takes something radical to bring you to a faith in God but not always. Who knows? Maybe God has something radical planned for me. If so I can't wait to see it! :-D Please pray for me and all the iGosians (cute name huh?) that we might be completely opened to the opportunities God gives us and that we might be radically changed for Him.

"Cut-and-Paste Christianity"

"In the beginning God mase man in His own image. Man has been making God in his image since." Mark Batterson. So often we stry to do everything our way. We take what God has given us and we change it. We "cut-out" the parts we don't like, the parts we can't explain, and the parts that make us "feel bad" about our sin. I don't even think we realize how amazing it is, by our standards, that God still loves us. If someone treated us like we treat God we wouldn't love them, we wouldn't want to have a relationship with them, we would do whatever it took to avoid them and hurt them. But that isn't what God called us to do. We can't fit God into a box of our own making whether its a physical one that we can touch or one that we've made up in our mind. There is just too much about Him that is beyond comprehension. We can't choose how we want Him to be because He already is! We can't say we follow God then treat Him and those we proclaim to love like dirt. We have to take God as He is and allow Him to change us so that we understand why He is the way He is. Anytime we try otherwise we're making assumptions that put us into a spiritual cage. Those assumptions trap us and keep us locked away. They hold us back. We are caging ourselves with our own logic. The more we try to rationalize the Bible the less we have to live with and for. Less love... less joy... less peace... less contentment... less happiness... less life... By rationalizing and trying to explain it away we take away everything that matters. Foremost our relationship with God but also people, blessings, things we take for granted... we might as well have as explained it away too.

Psalms 119

"...I will not neglect Your word." v. 16b How often do I try to fix a problem on my own? Do I neglect God's word? Do I disregard it? God gave us the Bible as a means of communication, and to show us His story. He's still writing that story today and He wants to put each of us in it. But if we aren't even spending time in His word how can He use us? If we aren't searching His word for answers how can He grow us in Him? If we aren't asking questions how can God direct us? "How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word." v. 9

White Washed Spirit

"Instead of embracing the mystery, we come up with human explanation for supernatural phenomena." Mark Batterson. "If I were to wish for anything I should not wish for wealth or power, but for the passioante sense of waht can be, for th eye which, ever young and ardent, sees the possible. Please disappont, possibility never. And what wine is so sparkling, what so fragrant, what so intoxicating as possibility." Soren Kierkegaard. We often make assumptions that take all the mystery and majesty out of life. We're literally making our lives dull. We might as well paint everything white. White buildings, white furniture, white clothes, white... everything. Because our assumptions are basically whitewash on the beautiful mysteries of the Spirit.

Variety Anyone?

When we have a routine we have to change it up a little every now and then or it stops doing us good. When we exercise the same way every day our muscles adapt and cease to grow stronger. Small changes in that routine can give us radical results physically. Its the same spiritually. During softball season when I played I wouldn't drink cokes at all. Not a drop. Because of that my workouts went better, I got stronger, faster, and lost like 15 pounds. If such a dramatic change happened just because I made the small change of not drinking cokes what would cutting out tv or video games do for our spiritual life? We all have things that we absolutely love and use all the time. I love to read. Books are my favorite thing in the world. A while back I fasted from books for 40 days during a bible study my youth group was doing. It was terrible! I had nothing to do. But one day as I was in my room it hit me. 'Since I can't read why don't I pray?' This was before I was truly saved but it still made a difference in my life. Even now sometimes I'll lay down the book in my hands and begin to pray. Little things like that make all the difference.

Psalms 115

"... He does whatever pleases Him." v. 3b God does things we don't understand but in the end He is pleased. What pleases Him the most is when what He does is for our best. NEWS FLASH!! Anything God does is for our best. The hard times are God's refining fire burning away our impurities. The good times are when He allows us to rest. He keeps His hand over us to protect us. He speaks to us to prepare us for the next round through the fire.

Routine or Ritual?

"Sacred routines become empty rituals when we do them out of left-brain memory and not right-brain imagination." Mark Batterson, Wild Goose Chase. Too often we "learn" how to worship God and then it becomes meaningless. Our worship and our prayer become unreal, unfeeling. There is no one way to worship. Our daily lives are worship. When we live our lives in a way that shows God's love, mercy, and grace we are pointing people to Him. We are making Him famous which is an essential act of worship. When we learn how we can't forget why. If we get to the point when we don't remember why we worship we're just going through the motions. Studies have shown that people tend to stop thinking about song lyrics after hearing them about 30 times. I myself am proof of this fact. I make myself listen to the words of songs, reminding myself of their truth and meaning. "He is jealouse for me..." God is a jealous God. As humans we know what jealousy feels like. We all have at least one best friend, or a boyfriend or girlfriend. When that person starts to spend time with other people more than you, those feelings start to take root. But they aren't of God. When they come to me I immediately have to pray. That jealous girl is not who I am so its not what I'm going to do. "He loves like a hurricane I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy..." In southeast Texas hurricanes are experienced. We've all seen the footage of hurricane Ike and the aftermath. We all saw the wind as it blew entire houses over, uprooted trees, and so much other damage. Take that picture and apply that force to the love of God. Only God's love isn't destructive. It builds us up and comforts us. "When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory..." When God's glory eclipses the afflictions we're experiencing- the loss of a loved one, a diagnosis we weren't expecting, an accident- whatever it may be, when those afflictions are covered by God's glory we have the promise of an end. We remember God's promise to never leave us, to provide a way out. "And I realize just how beatiful You are and how great Your affections are for me..." We take the focus off our problems and we see how beautiful God is and how much He truly cares. We see Him standing with us in the midst of the storm. The eye of hurricane Ike passed over my hometown and it was literally the calm in the in the midst of the storm. Above me there was blue sky and clouds, but when I looked further out in any direction there was dark clouds everywhere and lightning striking. I couldn't see the rain or hear the wind whistling but I'd already been through that so I knew what others were getting and knew what was coming. Its in the calm that we realize God is with us and that even though we know whats coming He'll stay with us. He's put us through the storm so we can help others who are still in it. "Oh, how He loves us so..." Kind of self explanatory. God loves us. Period. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. God's love is real. "He is jealous for me. He loves like a hurricane I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy. When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory and I realize just how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me. Oh, how He loves us so. Oh how He loves us. How He loves us all. "Yeah He loves us. Oh how He loves us. Oh how He loves us. Oh how He loves. And we are His portion and He is our prize. Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes. If His grace is an ocean we're all sinking. And Heaven meets earth like an unforseen kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest. I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way that He loves us. Oh how He loves us. Oh how He loves us. Oh He loves." David Crowder Band, How He Loves.

Psalms 113

God is the God of miracles. He takes the worst circumstances and makes them the best thing that ever happened to us. How could we ever think we can do a better job? That our plan is the best? "Jesus is going to save the world but, maybe, the best thing we can do is just get out of the way." Casting Crowns, What This World Needs. I have to stop trying to be God. He knows whats best. He sees the entire picture when I see only whats in front of me. If I start thinking in the sense of 'eternity' instead of 'right now' my priorites shift greatly. I need to choose where my allegiances truly lie. Either I'm a servant of God or a servant of self. I can't have it both ways.

Psalms 112

Even in the worst of times God will shine a light. He's not going to leave me in the dark. He's with me. When I'm hurting He holds me. When I'm crying He wipes my tears away. When I see no end to the hurt He fills me with His peace. When I can't go on anymore He fills me with His strength. He hasn't left me to fumble about in the dark. He's holding His hand out for me to take so He can lead me. Thats all He wants. For us to reach out and take His hand. He wants to show us the way but we have to choose to let Him. We're either all in or all out. There is no fence to straddle, no middle ground, when it comes to God.

Psalms 111

Ever wonder why at the worst times, your happiest memories come back to you? I've never really thought about it but its true. In my life when things have gotten bad it feels like I have so many memories clamoring to get past my distressed feelings and be at the forefront of my mine. Psalms 111:4 explains why: "He has caused His wonders to be remembered; The Lord is gracious and compassionate." God puts the good memories in a place to be remembered. He knows that when we're in hard times we'll need to remember happy times. Thats His grace and compassion at work. He helps us stay positive. Not all aspects of God are the ones we want to see though. In verse 10 it says "The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom." I struggle with fearing God. He's done so much good in my life and the lives of my family and friends. He hasn't destroyed many nations lately but He has the ability to. He has the power to use eanything and everything either for us or against us. We have to conciously remind ourselves that God isn't just the benevolant Father. He's the Awesome and Powerful Creator and Sustainer of the world. His ability to hold our world in His hands is frightening. He's bigger than anything we could even attempt to wrap our minds around. With a word He can change anything. Whether its goood or bad in our eyes doesn't matter because its God's will and it has a purpose. Yes, God is gracious and compassionate but He is also fear-inspiring. The only one who deserves to be feared.

Psalms 110

This chapter is about how God had promised to bring victory in war to His people, and yet, the thing that hits me is not that promise of victory, but of His promise of His presence. "The Lord is at your right hand..." v.5a He is here with me! He's standing next to me (or rather me next to Him) holding my hand ready to lead me in His way! His presence gives me courage and strength; it gives me joy, peace, and contentment. With my Savior by my side, and with His strength, I can do all things. He picks me up when I fall down and He walks with me in the quiet of the day. At night He gives me peace to sleep. He protects me from danger. He is with me when I feel alone. I think Tenth Avenue North said it best in their song 'By Your Side.' I'll be by your side wherever you've fallen in the dead of night whenever you're calling. Please don't fight these hands that are holding you. My hands are holding you. Here at My side My hands are holding you.

Psalms 109

This psalmist goes from asking for deliverance to asking God to punish his enemies to praying that God would bless him. From one extreme to the other. It just doesn't sit right with me. I don't get it. Did he actually think he was acting right by saying the things he did? "O God, whom I praise, do not remain silent..." v.1 "When he is tried, let him be found guilty and may his prayers condemn him..." v.7 "With my mouth I will greatly extol the Lord; in the great throng I will praise Him..." v.30 He goes from crying "save me! save me!" to "vengeance! vengeance!" to "oh God You're son good!" How can he do that? More importantly how can I? It's wrong to go from asking God to deliver me from something or to ask for a change of heart just so I can turn around to yell at someone and call them names. Then five minutes later I'm praising God with a sweet voice of innocence like nothing happened. No repentance, nothing. I have to be real with everything or God can't use me. Acting like that ruins the witness God gives me and causes more harm than good. "Be real with God and He will be real with you." Kent Matthews

Psalms 108

"For the help of man is worthless. With God we will gain the victory." v. 12a-13b How often do I rely on the help of people around me? Why do I forget that God is all-powerful? Only through Him will I b e able to do what He made me to do. If I trust in man, in myself, and not God everything will go wrong. Only by putting my trust fully in God will I have joy, peace, contentment, happiness, even patience! :-) Through God I gain the victory! I'm human, I love to win. When I know who is gonna win shouldn't I join them?! A human perspective yeah but in this situation its true. I know God is gonna win so why would I side against Him? Why would I trust in anything or anyone else?

Psalms 107

Again, a continuation of God's grace and mercy. I don't understand why God continued to bail out the Israelites and I don't understand why He keeps delivering us as Americans. So many times we've turned away, only to cry out again. Just as His people did so long ago. And for some reason He answers that call. Chalk another one up for love :-) "For He satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things." v. 9 What if we were thirsty for His word? What if we hungered for the things that made us more like Him? God has promised to take care of us but we have to ask for His strength, His mercy, and His wisdom. Ask and He'll give. His grace is all-sufficient for us. He knows what we need. "For He breaks down gates of bronze and cuts through bars of iron." v. 16 Nothing can stop God. That can go two ways. On the one hand it means we can't hide from God. I can't pretend that He doesn't know whats going on in my life. I can choose to let that be a comfort or I can let it make me guilty. It all depends on my actions. If I try to hide from Him it turns out bad. I seperate myself from Him. On the other hand it means that even in the hardest times God is right there with us. When I feel all alone and I'm pounded down by guilt, God is there. ready to take my burden. God is unstoppable. Words of freedom and peace to me.

Psalm 106

Wow. If you ever want to truly understand the amazingness of God's love for the Israelites read this passage. It lists a lot of the things that they did and yet God takes them back. Each time the Israelites messed up or turned away, God would allow a hardship to fall on them. When they would cry out to Him, He would save them. "... out of His great love He relented." v. 45b Seven times they either forgot His promise and what He did for them (3), they didn't believe His promises (1), or they angered God (3). Yet in the end God delivered them. If that doesn't show His unconditional love I don't know what would!! He loves His children no matter what. He seperates the sin from the sinner; hates the deed but loves the doer. Unconditional love.

Psalms 105

I feel both firghtened and excited at the same time while reading this passage. Its talking about the Israelites journey from Egypt. All the plagues, and the things that happened in the wilderness. God performed all these miracles for His children, showing His fathomless love for His children. But from the Egyptian's point of view it was a punishment for keeping the Israelites captive. God's wrath in action. Puts me even more in awe of my Savior. "That they may keep my precepts and observe my law." v. 45 God loves me no matter what but He hates my sin. That sin puts me outised His will where He can't use me. And if I'm not being used of God, I'm being used by Satan. I must "keep His precepts and observe His law" before He can use me.

Come Out of the Cage

Nowadays the norm for Christians has been getting up on Sundays, eat breakfast, get out of the car all smiles no matter what happened at home or on the way there, go to Sunday School, the 11:00 o'clock worship service (that absolutely has to end at noon otherwise half the congregation complains), and then going home to eat lunch and take a nap. And there is nothing wrong with that. Unless afterward you don't take what God has given you that morning and apply it to your life in a radical way. The sunday morning routine has become the cage that keeps us from doing God's work. There is a specific... idea... of how a person should act in church. "We'll sing this many songs standing, these sitting, don't you dare raise your hands when you sing, open your eyes look at the music minister and choir when you sing, sit quietly while the pastor talks..." There is no room for the joy of Jesus Christ when you're too busy worrying you're not acting like everyone wants you to. I tend to close my eyes and raise my hands during the music portion of worship. Sometimes I even do the choruses in sign language if I know the signs. But each time when I open my eyes I can almost feel the disaproving looks. For a while the thought of those looks was crippling. But I've learned to brush it off. I'm not there to worship them; I'm there to worship my awesome and powerful God and Father. These things put us in a cage but Jesus wants to take us out of the cages we're in and unleash on the world!! When we're inside the will of God we're the most dangerous things on the planet! With God's strength we can do anything in His will. But outside God's will is a place of complacency where Satan uses us to tear down God's kingdom instead of building it. Matthew 10:16a Jesus says "Look I'm sending you out life sheep among wolves." We are called to go out into crazy places. "The center of God's will is not a safe place but the most dangerous place in the world." Erwin McManus, Unstoppable Force.

Spirit Filled - New view of the Holy Spirit

Most of the time when I think of the Holy Spirit I don't think much about it. I've heard of people being filled of the Spirit but never truly understood what it meant. Now that I do understand I realize there were times when I was filled with God's Spirit. To be filled with the Spirit is to be completely God-conscious. To be unaware and uncaring of what others think of your actions and words. We lose our inhibitions. Another way to lose inhibitions would be to get drunk... I don't know about anyone else but I'd rather be aware of what I'm doing. Being drunk does take away self-consciousness but it doesn't give God-consciousness. "The word 'filled' comes from the Greek word pleroo, which carries the idea of being filled to the point of overflowing. It is the present imperative tense which means we should keep on being filled." When we are filled with the Spirit we change our focus from what others think to what God thinks. My thoughts on the Holy Spirit have actually been pretty narrow up to now. I guess I've always seen the Holy Spirit as just the third part of the Trinity who doesn't have much to do. Its just God's messenger right? NOPE!! It is as much its own seperate self as God or Jesus Christ but is also God's tool. The Spirit is a part of God that He puts in us to lead us; to help us lose our inhibitions and have faith. And to be filled with that piece of God... beyond imagination even though I've experienced it! Its like overflowing with the characteristics of God and wanting to pour it out onto others. Knowing God's will and doing it without hesitation or second thoughts. To be God-conscious is to be aware of only Him and to not worry about what others think. Isn't that what everyone longs for? To not care about what people think? Only by being filled with God's Spirit can anyone accomplish that.

Who wants to look foolish?

Okay this hit me pretty hard. This week Lion Chaser is about looking foolish. I hate looking foolish and of course I do often. But this is another kind of foolishness. Its God-directed foolishness. Faith is the willingness to look foolish. Following God will lead me to do some things that people will think are foolish. But faith lets me know that no matter how foolish I look I am doing God's will. I've heard the story of Noah all my life, but I never thought about how foolish he might have felt when he built an ark when no rain had ever fallen and no rain would fall for 120 when he finally finished. His neighbors made fun of him and everything. Wouldn't that make me feel foolish? Paul spread God's word even when he was threatened and thrown in jail. Daniel continued to pray despite knowing he could be thrown into the lions' den. I've never built an ark, I've never been thrown into jail because I shared God's word, and I've never been put into a den of lions for praying. That may not be as prevelent in our day and time but there are other things that happen all the time. "I think the reason many of us have never killed a giant or walked on water or found the Messiah is because we're not willing to look foolish." 1 Corinthians 1:27: 'Instead, God has chosen the world's foolish things to shame the wise, and God has chosen the world's weak things to shame the strong.' "Child-like faith." Something that is often preached in churches across the world but looking foolish gives it a whole new meaning. God uses children to do His will a lot whether they know it or not. Children are willing to do whatever it takes to get something thats important to them done. Including looking foolish. I don't want God to pass me over because I was too full of myself to let Him fill me with Him.

Lion Chaser

Lion Chaser is a bible study we've been doing on Sunday nights in my youth group. Its about facing, and somtimes even chasing, the fears God has allowed you to have. I don't know if how many people have ever heard of Benaiah but this guy did some pretty crazy things. He killed two sons of a Moabite, chased a lion into a pit on a snowy day (which explains the name Lion Chaser) and he killed an Egyptian by taking his spear and using it against him. My first reaction to this was open mouthed amazement. These are things no one can do on their own. Benaiah had God on his side helping him to face his fears, to chase his lions. Since starting this bible study I've managed to chase a couple lions of my own. Let me tell you its worth it! When you finally face your fear you're out of your comfort zone and God is all you've got with you. But afterwards you see that you've grown and you're willing to do more of what God tells you. You learn to hear him more often and in louder conditions. You won't always hear Him but when you do and you follow Him it gets easier. A question we all need to ask ourselves is: "What lion does God want me to chase?" We all have them and they're all in God's hands. He has a plan for each one. People always use corny stuff like "who will chase the lion with me?" the more important thing is "Who will chase the lion with God?"

Welcome!

Okay so I got this idea from someone at my church. I'm going to blog all about stuff that God is teaching me up until Tokyo. Granted I got a late start but better late than never right? While I'm in Tokyo I'll be journaling every night before bed, I'll come back and post my journal pages here when I get home. God has great things in store, not only for Tokyo, but for those of us who are going to Tokyo. I pray that all my words here would be from God and not me. Here we go!! Feel free to comment on all my postings :-)